Tag Archives: news

All the slutty news that fit to print.

“I should just take him home and screw him.”

That is a line from a Jodie Foster film, one that she was raped in, by the way.

And it was just spoken by a woman in her 60’s at the next table, by the way.

It would usually be the type of thing that would catch attention.

But it was her friends comment just before that made me look.

“Whats the latest news?”

That is the type of question that you expect some sort of solid reply about politics, world news, or family business.

Not some random lament about whether or not she should get her skank on.

The two women at the next table are well dressed, mid-60’s and have a solid upper-middle class look to them.
And, apparently, they are a couple of old school sluts.

I would say hoe, but its a different generational term.

The primary skank, lets call her Thelma, has a new male friend who is in the process of finalizing the estate of Thelma’s aunt.

Louis, the inquisitive friend of said skank, is someone you could see running the church bake sale,


(Incidentally, the Thelma and Louis names being used are just what it look like, a childish smack at the feminist movement using characters from a REALLY shitty movie.)

Pretty much the rest of the conversion was something out of a trashy teen comedy.

When did old ladies go down this road?

And the one phrase that keeps coming back to my mind is the comment about that news.

News used to mean so much more.

Now its used in some sort of dirty whispering like a verbal “Letters to Penthouse – Slutty Seniors Edition.”

If they were 40 years younger, hell even 20 years younger, this would be a much hotter conversation.

The object of Thelma and Louis’s conversation was the young lawyer handling the estate.

And, evidently, Thelma is a cougar, old even by the loose definition of cougar.

Poor bastard.

You would hope he has more sense, but he is, after all, a lawyer, they are capable of anything.

And so, evidently, is Thelma, or at least she thinks so.

It could end badly, the low end risk is the lawyer would be banging his client.

On the high end, well, lets just hope that his Red Cross card is up to day.

Nothing sadder than to lose a loved one during sex.

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Posted by on February 21, 2014 in Uncategorized


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