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I reserve the right to be a dick.

I get hate mail from time to time.

The funny thing is, 95% of the hate mail comes from the same people, week in week out.

The emails all start more or less the same, a claim that they rarely read the blog, this despite the fact that they email EVERY week.

And its not even original stuff, its the same whiny-ass stuff every week.

I would say like a broken record, but its not enough. A broken record that lives alone and has over a dozen cats and not one blood relative that is willing to talk to them.

The reason I am bringing any of this up, is that one of them, a mewling little soundbox from Australia that goes by the dumb name of TinyMouse, asked a question that you think all of them would ask.

Why are you so rude when you respond to my email?

Let me explain.

For a long time, my first response was “Fuck off”. Short, sweet, to the point.

And then, like so many things, I got tired of it.

So the reply emails became a blog post all their own.

Just really obscene and insulting in a personal, mean spirited way.

Sometimes I will cut and paste obscene pictures from online into the email. (Is that admissable in court? No clue. I don’t think its harrassment, they are all responses.)

To me, I would not email any asshole again if I got this sort of response.

However, TinyMouse has gotten over 3-4 dozen of this type of email and still emails me every week to chastise me. And the phrase “Belligerent cis-male” is always included. (I always counter that with “Cat rapist” which seems to flip her out, she has a lot of cats.)

And yes, there is a sane part of me that realizes how childish this is.

However, the logical me gave it up a long time ago. The 800lbs gorilla that is the childish me has been running the show. And he’s a dick.

There has to be a psychology 101 textbook that can lay out the basics of sociopathic blogging, but I have yet to run across it.

And now, allow me to insert something different here.

Like a mental sorbet to cleanse the cerebral pallet.

I just visited the bathroom and someone came out of the men’s room just as I walked up.

AND HE STANK LIKE SHIT ON A HOT DAY!

Homeless, but that foamy neck kind of unwashed homeless.

God, I miss Manhattan Beach homeless. They had standards.

Needless to say, I am not in Manhattan Beach.

And it shows.

Back to vile email.

As a group, the critics of the blog are a whiny bunch of Chatty Cathy dolls that pull their own internet strings non-stop.

Its as annoying as it is humorous.

Much like playing chess for money with a retarded, crackhead, welfare mother, its only funny for the first few minutes. After that, its just sad and really annoying. (And if that last, carefully crafted sentence doesn’t get those fucktard’s panties in a twist, I don’t know my shit.)

You have to wonder what it is about obsessively reading and criticising a barely read blog that does it for this bunch of shit wads.

Activism should involve an element of chance that you will make a difference.

They really need to piss on the fire and call in the dogs, because they lost this fight way before they started.

But, like I always say, its important to have a hobby.

And, their hobby is to point out social improprieties to the literary malcontents of the blogospere.

Just like my hobby is to fuck with them.

Works for me.

Bite me.

 
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Posted by on March 20, 2015 in Uncategorized

 

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If you can’t say anything nice, blog about it.

I have written and deleted 4 different takes on the same subject and I can’t seem to finish the piece without it being the type of thing that would burn a lot of bridges.

Not just burn them, but nuke them, salt the earth, and leave it irradiated for eons.

Divorce, relationships, work, family, blogging…etc.

And some of these bridges I still need access to.

So, rather than let it go and forget about it, (Something I NEVER do.) I will just backburner the subject until I can do it without the “Scorched earth” result, or situations change and I no longer give a shit about the outcome. (And that is a dangerous frame of mind.)

So here is something different.

5 different reactions for the same thing.

The last blog post stirred up some “Stuff” for lack of a better word with a lot of you.

Since the preferred method of whining and bitching at me seems to be the anonymous email (You cowardly pieces of shit), I will address those first.

Response #1: First off, its ridiculous to declare yourself an “Ardent feminist” and claim you read the blog regularly. Either you are lying thru your teeth, mainly because no Feminist, ardent or not, would read this misogynistic swill without putting a hit out on me. Which means you are a wannabe ardent feminist. That is pathetic. Its like wanting to be known as the snappiest dresser in special ed. Bite me.

Response #2: You said in your email “While I am not a teacher” blah blah frickin blah. Therefore, you are not qualified to tell me what tense I am using, correct or otherwise. This is sadder than the wannabe ardent feminist issue. Your email was fairly grammatically correct and was as boring as cat shit on the sidewalk. Bite me.

Response #3: I am aware of the fact that Jesus loves me. However, if you are under the impression that the Almighty has an issue with this post or any previous posts, you are sadly mistaken. The Almighty not only gets me, he thinks I am a hysterical genius. One of his finer creations. (My mother said so.)

Response #4 Asking me to post something about your favorite charity tells me that you have so little respect for not just me, but anyone you send that poorly written email to, that you haven’t even taken the time to read the blog. If it doesn’t fit the subject matter or flavor of the blog, it will have the opposite effect of driving people away from your charity. Just showing it to people does not magically fix it. I was a salesman long enough to know that, with the proper presentation, you can sell anything to people. Especially ideas.

Response #5 My mother is right and I am deeply ashamed and sorry for scribbling this rubbish. Love you, mommy.

As time goes on, I have come to really enjoy and even look forward to the anonymous emails. Even if you are a pack of whiny pussies.

Let me leave you with this oft-time repeated reply to criticism.

Bite me.

 
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Posted by on November 15, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

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