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Drowning kittens doesn’t sound so bad.

Stupid is as stupid does.

That is an iconic line from Forrest Gump, the story of a slow man who has wild adventures by simply being.

Deep thoughts there.

And then there is the college students sitting next to me.

There is a HUGE difference between being intelligent and thinking you are intelligent.

Someone told these two they were brilliant and they ran with that.

But the stupidity is mind numbing.

Think I’m kidding?

Top 3 brilliant utterances of the Mensa twins:

  1. “The professor doesn’t understand that you can know all the different elements of a subject and not be able to express them in test form.” (You mean that point where you acknowledge what you know?)
  2. “It’s a sexuality class, I shouldn’t have to discuss sex, I KNOW sex.” (How silly of the professor to discuss sex in a sexuality class. Hang it up, teacher! You missed the point!)
  3. “Calculus is misogynistic at its core. It should be illegal.” (Its fucking math, sugar! I agree it should be illegal, but for different reasons.)

I truly weep for the business community when this generation is five years out of school.

The amount of wrongful termination lawsuits will be staggering, right before all of them are thrown out of court.

Because you are allowed to fire people for being slow, lazy, dumb and self entitled.

Thats not illegal, thats smart business.

An entire generation you can label “Dead weight”.

I feel dumber for sitting next to these empty vessels.

I now feel bad for the “Empty Vessel” analogy.

Because it goes both ways.

You can fill an empty vessel with knowledge and facts and its a wonderful thing.

Or, as in this case, you can fill it full of shit and garbage and this liquidy stuff that has equal parts of shit and garbage in it.

Bad analogy, and a scary visual, shit and garbage actually have a purpose in life.

What is the purpose in life for these two mouth-breathers?

After they graduate with diplomas in women’s studies, they will flit from one job to another, not being good at any of them.

They will go to ANTIFA protests and get their topics wrong.

They will finally settle into non-paying volunteer work, because “Thats their passion”. (And charities are notoriously forgiving if you are willing to work for free.

And in the end, you and I will have to pay for their healthcare and student loans.

But, to get back to the empty vessel, whats wrong with filling it with coffee?

Mmmmmm coffee.

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Posted by on August 25, 2017 in Uncategorized

 

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The four horsemen of ignorance

“Try to be a rainbow in someones cloud.” Maya Angelou

Possible the shittiest bumper stick or facebook meme ever.

I saw that online today and laughed out loud.

The truth is a beautiful and terrible thing, and should therefore be treated with caution.” Albus Dumbledore

JK Rowling is responsible for 40% of everyone currently reading.

Of the two, I think she beats Angelou like a prison snitch.

Sometimes, who says it has more value to people than what they say.

But there is nothing worse than something dumb that an idiot thinks is deep.

“I don’t want to just be, I want to be HERE.”

That was the empty headed, dip shit comment that caught my ear.

The patio at Starbucks is a dicey thing in the summertime.

Pick the wrong spot on the wrong day and you are drinking hot coffee at a sweat fest.

But a Summer breeze and some shade and damn that coffee tastes better.

Enter the morons.

First year college students are a notably ignorant bunch, but God save us from the induced retardation of first year liberal arts majors.

These kids are not goth, but they are trying so hard to be intelligent and deep, there is an actual pain associated to listening to them.

The lead pussy, lets call him Tristan, is an emaciated tall kid with stringy black hair, a touch of mascara, and if my nose is accurate, does not believe in that whole bathing thing.

Great, BO and mommy told him he is brilliant.

This is a bad combination for survival.

Pray he never goes to jail, because he has “Prison Bitch” written all over him.

His worthless liberal arts degree will fast track him for supervisor at Kinkos shortly after his first decade at the counter, making copies.

I don’t normally hate someone at first sight, but today I will make an exception.

His posse is an impressive bunch in the realm of ignorant wanna-bees, but they rank below Tristan in the Order Condescendi.

First is Molly.

Molly is the remora student of the bunch.

A Remora is a fish that cannot fend for itself, so it attaches itself to another fish, usually a shark, and feeds off of the scraps.

While I hate the thought of classifying Tristan as anything as impressive or aggressive as a shark, it seems to fit.

Molly seems to feed off of Tristan’s half assed comments as if they were manna from the heavens.

Also, chocolate and fried foods, if her skin is any indicator.

Then there are the Twins.

I say twins because they sound so much alike, if you are not watching, you are not sure which one spoke.

They are like the supporting characters in a Socrates play.

“Yes, Socrates.”

“How wise of you, Socrates.”

But no actual thoughts of their own.

This is prime Occupy [Insert name of someplace people work for a living] protesters.

Tristan is concerned about his existential placeholder in the cosmos.

He really shouldn’t worry, his place in all of this is assured, the fix is in.

He is a loser, wear that badge like a medal boy, you have been working hard for the failure in your future.

And someone should track down your parents, sober them up, and slap them both in the mouth for raising this little cross for society to bare.

If it were not for the coffee, I would have left by now.

Mmmmm coffee…

 
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Posted by on July 29, 2016 in Uncategorized

 

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