In my own judgmental way, I try not to.
It’s like that phrase, “Don’t hate.”
This is always said by people who judge and hate so much that, as a person, it defines them.
These are the same people who also claim they can’t stand “Drama”.
This is because they exist in a hip deep pile of drama and drag that shit along with them.
And if you just thought “That’s not me”.
Yes it is, quit being a pussy and at least be honest with yourself, even if you can’t with everyone else.
And if you still can’t agree that this is how you live, what you need is what alcoholics call a “Moment of clarity”.
Here is the bonus for you.
Addicts need to hit rock bottom before they find their clarity.
Emotional rock bottom is less messy on the outside and easier to hit.
Inside you are a mess, but on the outside? You didn’t shit yourself, got yourself in a bar fight you really should have known better and (most of?) your relatives are still talking to you. (So you still get an invite to Thanksgiving.)
But how do you recognize if you are a broken train wreck.
Here is a HUGE indicator.
If someone has ever told you “That’s rude.” in response to something you just said, and your response is, “Truth hurts”.
Then you’re a bitch.
And that is not directed at any particular gender. (Guys have the capability to be much bigger bitches than the ladies.)
But there is hope.
The silver lining in all of this is that salvation is just a short distance away.
Stop being a bitch.
Simple phrase, complex concept, especially if you have been existing in a bubble of negativity for a decade or more. (Most have and its a pretty wretched place to be without realizing it.)
I can hear your denial from here.
And your accusations.
What about you?
Are you familiar with the phrase “Water off a duck’s back”?
It takes not caring to another level.
Take this test.
Have you ever had someone tell you that you are an asshole?
How did that make you feel?
If you answered the question at all, you have no choice but to stop being a bitch.
It’s the difference between viewing it as judgement or observation/identification.
Like asking a frog his opinion of the water.
So here is the recipe for Shakubuku. (Buddhist term for the path of a happier nature.)
Shut the fuck up.
And while you are shutting up, start listening.
Not to words, those spew out of most people’s mouths at a rate consistent with the flow of a large sewage pipe.
But what do they mean?
This isn’t Avatar, but you need to make the bond.
Phrasing, body posture, eyes respiration, all the basic skills of an FBI profiler go into truly listening to other people.
And only then, do you realize the truth.
Most of them don’t have anything to say.