“Try to be a rainbow in someones cloud.” Maya Angelou
Possible the shittiest bumper stick or facebook meme ever.
I saw that online today and laughed out loud.
“The truth is a beautiful and terrible thing, and should therefore be treated with caution.” Albus Dumbledore
JK Rowling is responsible for 40% of everyone currently reading.
Of the two, I think she beats Angelou like a prison snitch.
Sometimes, who says it has more value to people than what they say.
But there is nothing worse than something dumb that an idiot thinks is deep.
“I don’t want to just be, I want to be HERE.”
That was the empty headed, dip shit comment that caught my ear.
The patio at Starbucks is a dicey thing in the summertime.
Pick the wrong spot on the wrong day and you are drinking hot coffee at a sweat fest.
But a Summer breeze and some shade and damn that coffee tastes better.
Enter the morons.
First year college students are a notably ignorant bunch, but God save us from the induced retardation of first year liberal arts majors.
These kids are not goth, but they are trying so hard to be intelligent and deep, there is an actual pain associated to listening to them.
The lead pussy, lets call him Tristan, is an emaciated tall kid with stringy black hair, a touch of mascara, and if my nose is accurate, does not believe in that whole bathing thing.
Great, BO and mommy told him he is brilliant.
This is a bad combination for survival.
Pray he never goes to jail, because he has “Prison Bitch” written all over him.
His worthless liberal arts degree will fast track him for supervisor at Kinkos shortly after his first decade at the counter, making copies.
I don’t normally hate someone at first sight, but today I will make an exception.
His posse is an impressive bunch in the realm of ignorant wanna-bees, but they rank below Tristan in the Order Condescendi.
First is Molly.
Molly is the remora student of the bunch.
A Remora is a fish that cannot fend for itself, so it attaches itself to another fish, usually a shark, and feeds off of the scraps.
While I hate the thought of classifying Tristan as anything as impressive or aggressive as a shark, it seems to fit.
Molly seems to feed off of Tristan’s half assed comments as if they were manna from the heavens.
Also, chocolate and fried foods, if her skin is any indicator.
Then there are the Twins.
I say twins because they sound so much alike, if you are not watching, you are not sure which one spoke.
They are like the supporting characters in a Socrates play.
“How wise of you, Socrates.”
But no actual thoughts of their own.
This is prime Occupy [Insert name of someplace people work for a living] protesters.
Tristan is concerned about his existential placeholder in the cosmos.
He really shouldn’t worry, his place in all of this is assured, the fix is in.
He is a loser, wear that badge like a medal boy, you have been working hard for the failure in your future.
And someone should track down your parents, sober them up, and slap them both in the mouth for raising this little cross for society to bare.
If it were not for the coffee, I would have left by now.