I have begun to notice a disturbing trend.
Grown women who loudly proclaim to be “Sick of the drama” but always seem to be hip deep in drama.
Its like they never left high school.
They live on Facebook for the most part.
Well over 50% of their posts are motivational posters proclaiming variations on the two main themes of:
- How a “Real Man” will treat them.
- How a “True Friend” will treat them.
Lets tackle “Real Man” first.
First off, anyone born with testicles is a real man, as opposed to what you might identify with. (I mean, I identify with being an asshole, but the concept of a human sized sphincter walking around is both scary and the science doesn’t support it.)
To loosely translate, paraphrase it, or just be the first person to say this shit out loud, the person posting this stuff has had really bad taste in men in the past and has not learned from their mistakes.
Does anyone have an ounce of shock left at the thought that a “Bad boy” who is dangerous and likes to party is not the odds on favorite for being a kind and supportive partner?
The sad reality of it is that the boring, consistent, “nice” guy that you don’t want is exactly the guy you claim to want.
Same message, said nicely and said mean:
Figure out what you need from a long term relationship and don’t settle.
If you are tired of being screwed over by the bad boys, quit screwing the bad boys.
(ADD sidebar: Iris by the Goo Goo Dolls is possibly one of the better love songs from the 80’s.)
Before you snort derisively and read on, go back and soak up those two little bits of advice.
Let the wisdom permeate your head.
Got it? Good. I think we are all better people now.
If those lines really hit home for you, don’t worry, I will feed you, baby bird.
(By the way, the line about screwing the bad boys actually got me hung up on by a female acquaintance who decided that I might be a sympathetic shoulder one night. Truth can be a bitch, people.)
Now for the whole friends illusion.
Here is a really sad truth.
The only true, life long friends you will have are the people that you grew up with.
Everyone else you meet after puberty are simply acquaintances that will show up and leave without warning.
This is not to belittle their temporary friendship, not at all.
But unless you have an emotional foundation that is based on the sentimental attachment formed before experience forces reason down your throat, you don’t have a chance in hell of putting up with someone you are not married or screwing (Sometimes mutually exclusive).
So whining and crying that someone you have known for less than a year as a legal adult has suddenly done something that was for themselves and inconvenienced you is kind of silly.
Adults have agendas and baggage, and those two things kind of make your agenda 3 on that list in their mind.
Not their fault, you are doing the same thing, but in your head, you like to think you don’t.
It doesn’t make you or them bad people, by the way.
It just makes you humans.
And that is the problem.
The overwhelming majority of humans are idiots.
My own extended family excepted, not to be biased or anything.