Sometimes it’s important to pay a little homage to what brought us all here.
The founder of the feast, as it were.
If you say it softly, it’s almost like praying. (My mother is not going to like that line, by the way.)
Ok, it’s not, but you know what I mean.
Caffeine, in the form of coffee is the most acceptable addiction on the planet.
It beats the shit out of meth in the public eye.
You can sit in church and sip coffee. (Not the church I grew up in, but others.)
I actually had someone tell me how bad Red Bull is for you, while sipping coffee.
You might say people in glass houses should not throw stones, but I am a firm believer in being a total hypocrite.
I will lob rocks from my glass porch all day long.
And if something breaks, call the glass guy to fix it, he has kids to feed.
To do anything else is unamerican.
Hypocrisy and denial is the American way.
Despite how that sounds, I am not knocking it, I am reveling in it.
The people who boo hoo about most things are wildly hypocritical about most things.
- I have a friend who, while between jobs, slept in downtown LA in the Occupy LA encampment. She tweeted incessantly on her Iphone (Newest model), used her visa platinum card to order food to be delivered, and every other day, would drive her new BMW to her parents place in the Hollywood Hills to shower and bitch her parents out. My suggestion that her parents should have her tasered on site for being a family embarrassment did not go over well.
- If you are addicted to cigarettes and use a nicotine patch to stop smoking, you do realize that you are simply switching one drug for another and you aren’t really quitting anything. The cigarette companies are the ones that make the patch and trust me, they have no interest in you quitting smoking. But it does look good in the news, doesn’t it?
- Just about anyone with a strong opinion about anything. Dig deep enough and you will find something they have, do or believe that contradicts that strong opinion enough that, God forbid you point that out in a rudely sarcastic way, they will flip you off and drop the subject.
Back to coffee.
My first sip in the morning sends a shudder thru me that is as close to a tiny orgasm as you can get without having to change your skivvies.
But here is how great an addiction coffee is.
If you go to a support group for addiction to various drugs?
They serve coffee, the most pure of drugs.
How great is that?
So, as I sit here in my little glass tower, pontificating on the vagaries of the human condition from the existen-
Shit, out of coffee.
Where was I?
Oh, coffee, right.
It’s a good thing.