On my best behavior, sort of.

09 Oct

There is a certain magic and stupidity that comes over people when they travel.

I live in Southern California, pretty much in the place that everyone else either moves to, or goes to on vacation.

And if you just asked the silly question of why would people move here, spend a weekend in Wisconsin in the dead of winter and you will realize where the phrase “Dead of Winter” came from.

So, since this is pretty much a sunny paradise, you can understand why I would jump at a trip to a place that is that much more paradise-esque.

Catalina Island.

And not just a random day trip, which can be fun, don’t get me wrong.

But this is for a wedding.

And weddings rock.

Catalina holds the Guinness book record for most bars per square mile in the world.

And the party starts on the boat ride over.

Its not often you see a ferry with a cash bar, but it is a nice idea.

And when you find out that the aforementioned bar is fully stocked with quality craft brews, it is just wrong not to drink.

The short version of this is that the ferry ride was good, and I arrived with a few cocktails in me and in the company of old friends.

The irony of living in a sunny paradise, but being descended from a pale people who have had the ability to tan bred out of them is not lost on me. While I don;t mind the sunlight, there is a certain point that I hug the shadows like a vampire forced out in the daytime.

You tend to fall into a slower pace when you are on vacation, no matter how short that vacation might be.

And much like Olympic diving, your score goes higher when the difficulty factor is higher as well.

So for this little vacation Olympic event, the difficulty is raised by being on that vacation for the purpose of going to a friend’s wedding.

Another difficulty factor is that there are a number of not only old friends, but some old high school peeps that have hated me for years.

So the stage is set for possible mayhem.

It is now the day after the wedding/reception.

Good lord. The shame is bordering on overwhelming.

A few thoughts.

Alcohol? Bad. Very bad.

There is a special section of hell for a single man that maneuvers an insanely hot married woman into giving him dirty dancing lessons in front of her really pissed off husband.

Also, seafood will never be my friend.

Food poisoning and alcohol poisoning have remarkably similar symptoms for some people.

Also, having a ticket for the 6:45 ferry back to the mainland does not mean they will hold the boat for you.

4 days after the wedding/reception and being all but deported back to the mainland.

I love weddings. There is something awe inspiring about seeing people at that apogee of happiness.

This is the time before, God forbid, hideous fights, harsh words, insane in-laws, baggage causing events.

Everything is gold. pure and clean. Frost was onto something there.

I wish them well, I wish them the toast I have managed to utter at pretty much every wedding I have ever attended.

I wish you luck, I wish you love, I wish you patience, and most of all, keep in mind that you chose them.

Stay gold, Pony Boy. Stay gold.

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Posted by on October 9, 2015 in Uncategorized


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