Pissing yourself.

24 May

I love the beach.

A long walk along the bike path that borders the beach at sunset is incredible.

The sights are incredible, and the smells of the beach always make me feel good.

And then I met Tommy.

Actually, I smelled Tommy before I saw Tommy.


That is what assailed my nose, the overwhelming stench of pee-pee.

To put the smell in perspective, if you pee on something and then later on you pee on it again, then give it a day and come back and pee on it a few more times, then take that something and dip it
in a vat of piss.

And then I saw Tommy.

He’s a Hermosa Beach homeless guy.

That means he’s pretty mellow, never aggressive, and smiles at people.

The person I am walking with beelines as far away as she can, her sense of smell is excellent.

I, on the other hand, have had a crappy sense of smell for a long time due to a hockey injury years ago.

“Hey buddy, hows it going?” Tommy starts off nice and friendly, he is a Hermosa Beach homeless, after all.

(The rude or aggressive homeless are run out of town petty quick. Hermosa Beach makes its money as a nightlife/tourist attraction. Anything that hurts that is dealt with.)

Tommy never asks for money, and its one of those things that is a key with me.

Plus he is incredibly articulate.

I give him more than I usually give anyone and head on.

But let me take a moment to explain the smell compared to the intellect.

Tommy was one of the most polite, rational homeless men I have ever talked to.

However, he stinks of piss so strongly, that although I am sure he has some solid BO going on, I cannot smell it over the ammonia stench of urine.

This is not one ripe day of pissing yourself, this is day in, day out, piss upon piss.

But, a surprisingly nice guy.

Moving on. It takes about 5 or so minutes to clear out the sinuses.

But, ironically, I have to pee now.

There is a cinder block building with a peeked roof by the pier, and these are the bathrooms.

Although I have never been in these buildings, I know how bathrooms work.

The toilets are girls on the north side of the building, the boys on the South side.

Each toilet is an individual room, 2 feet wide, by 3 feet long.

Bricks from floor to 10 foot high ceiling.

Only natural light filtering in from the outside.

Stainless steel toilet with no seat.

I am taking a shit in prison.

The only bonus I can see is the fact that the door is locked and I cannot be raped while my pants are down.

But thats the only bonus.

This might be the single most humbling shit I have ever taken.

My knees are together and I am feeling like I am shitting at the bottom of a well.

And Lassy is not bringing help.

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Posted by on May 24, 2013 in Uncategorized


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