Please beat your kids.

08 Jan

I first became acquainted with Meho in line at the airport.

Meho is about 2 and still doesn’t talk.

But thats ok, he screams.

And mom is ok with that.

Mom seems to work in a state of constantly ignoring Meho, who spends his spare time shrieking at the top of his lungs.

And they are 2 people behind me in line.


This couldn’t get any better if someone stabbed me.

Perhaps Ray Lewis has some free time. (For those Baltimore Ravens fans that are fuming right now, the man’s a criminal, deal with it.)

Sorry about that, having a text argument with a new muse about Lewis’s retirement.

Back to Meho.

Mom seems to have her phone stuck to her ear.

Every few minutes, she jiggles the stroller Meho is strapped down in, which freaks him out more.

She can’t even see him.

This is getting better and better.

I only know that his name is Meho because, when he was taking a gulp of air in between shrieks, mom interrupted her important phone call to say, “‘Sokay Meho.” before she got back on the phone.

I googled “Sokay” and came up with nothing.

Might be a foreign language known as Spanglish. (Only moderately racist, don’t get your panties in a twist.)

Luckily, the line moves up, and there is a chance that I might go to the baggage check counter about 25 feet away.

No such luck, the counter 5 feet away suddenly becomes open and the rep waves me over.

I check my bag and make small talk over the background screams of Meho.

The rep is looking more and more agitated as we go, things are not looking good.

Time to smack the hornets nest.

“My mother would have smacked my ass by now.”

The rep looks up at my comment, realizing that since I brought it up, he is semi cleared to  comment back.

“My mother would never have let it go this far, she would have beat me to death by now.”

I snort and figure thats it.

Oh no, we are not done yet, the rep is not thru yet.

“I don’t get these Mexicans and their kids.”

This would be considered racist anywhere else in the world, but the rep is black and, according to CNN, cannot be racist.  (Not my rules, that ignorant statement came from a CNN host, no bullshit.)

“Really.” I am under no obligation to defuse the situation here.

“Mexicans have all these kids and don’t know how to raise em.”

The rep hands me my boarding pass, just as two things happen.

First, from behind me, over Meho’s screams, “EXCUSE ME?!?!”

Meho’s mom caught that last comment from the rep.

Second, the rep’s supervisor happened to be walking behind him at the moment he said it.

I grab my boarding pass and scoot, i don’t want to be caught in the middle of this delightful shit storm.

With my vacating the counter, Meho’s mom reflexively pushes Meho’s stroller up to the counter.

Presumably to check her bag and rip the help a new one.

I stop at the end of the row near the door and just watch the whole scene unfold.

Rep is in the wrong here, but is not backing down. He is whisper fighting with the supervisor, who appears to be about 12 years old.

Every now and then, he angrily gestures at Meho and his mom.

It appears that rep is trying to make the case to supervisor that Mexicans do indeed have all these kids and can’t raise em.

Imagine my good fortune to be here on Rep’s last day of employment.

Time to head to the gate.

I wonder if they gave Meho’s mom free tickets before she called the police?


Posted by on January 8, 2013 in Uncategorized


2 responses to “Please beat your kids.

  1. Mary

    January 8, 2013 at 4:00 pm

    I believe the proper term is mi’jo which is a contraction of mi hijo or my son. Used to address younger boys. From the urban dictionary. Just saying….

    • Bittermac

      January 9, 2013 at 2:49 pm

      It is, just being a dick.


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