The holidays shit storm.

27 Dec

The day after Christmas is often a blurry ordeal.

If you are mom and dad, you are trying to get the house cleaned up after the kids have destroyed it.

If you are a single woman, you are cleaning up the tear soaked Kleenex and empty Hagen Daaz quart containers that are everywhere. (This is based on the true story of a girl I know who’s biological clock began ticking at age 16 and now finds her single, kidless, boyfriendless and jobless at 43.)

If you are a single guy, your place looks the same, mainly because you go to other peoples houses for the holidays.

Use your own place? Fuck that nonsense.

Single guys usually have an issue with anyone else coming into their personal space for any period longer than sex.

Its a shallow point of view for anyone other than single guys.

And, once the feel good holiday of Christmas is over, the in between period starts.

This is that awkward, two days after Christmas, but before New Years that kind of has that dull feeling like you just got invited to watch your aunt have her feet scraped.

Let that one sink in.

It is during this period that most people get that malaise.

The emotional shit storm of Christmas and the parties to come on the horizon.

And you are stuck in the middle.

It can get ugly.

I seem to be that person that people mistakenly think is a sympathetic shoulder to cry on.

This is true only if you think that a true friend is someone that would listen to your problems and either use them against you in order to get you into bed, or belittle you in a blog.

Or both.

Don’t judge, we’ve all met, people.

This is usually a really easy time of the year to feel down, even for those of us who are hyper and bubbly due to a really twisted metabolism.

However, I am a firm believer in stacking the deck.

Just on the off chance that my mind decides I am its whipping boy this holiday season, I will plan activities that leave me no choice than to be in a good mood.

I will do this even if I am heading into the holidays with a great attitude.

My mind can and will turn on me like an angry snake, and it doesn’t play fair.

Read a few of these blog posts and consider the fact that I filter a lot of the more offensive crap out in the name of trying to retain some readers, rather than drive everyone away.

Now think of what my mind will do when jini is out of the bottle and its trying to hurt someone.

Not pretty.

Better to be safe than suicidal.

Speaking of, this is about the tenth year in a row that I have heard of the holiday suicide of someone I have met at least once.

This years victim is a guy I worked with about 20 years ago.

This guy had it all back when I knew him.

Employed, kids, house, nice car, and possibly the hottest wife outside of a porn film I have ever seen.

He was alone and homeless and it would appear divorced when he checked out.

Sorry to hear.

He was a good guy and always laughed at my jokes.

And to an attention whore that is golden.

I wish him peace.

Moving on.

Now that everyone is in an upbeat mood, let me finish this post with a thought that will get you through the holidays.

Our taxes are DEFINITELY going up, we’re screwed.

Happy New Year!!!

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Posted by on December 27, 2012 in Uncategorized


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