Trying to sell your shit.

06 Nov

The gypsy’s have moved in up the street.

Is it really Gypsy’s? No clue.

But there is a garage sale that started the day they moved in, and is still going on right now.

I think they miss the clue that a garage sale is supposed to be temporary.

And what they are selling is pure shit.

You know how you will go really late on a Sunday to a garage sale and all the good stuff is gone?

And all the secondary good stuff is gone?

Its late enough in the day that all the marginally good stuff is gone?

And all that is left is the shit that ends up sitting on the curb next to the garbage cans because no one would take it for free.

Even the homeless guys pushing shopping carts and looking for scrap metal don’t even glance at it.

And thats just sad.

Sometimes, when you go garage sale hunting, you really find some treasures.

But, the odds are against finding serious gems in any garage sale.

Mainly because, and I don’t know why people don’t see this, a garage sale is basically a collection of other peoples shit that they don’t feel is worth keeping.

Its one step up from being flat out garbage.

And thats just nasty.

In every neighborhood, there is that one house that is always having a garage sale, not including my new neighbors.

And the stuff they have for sale usually sucks.

But, at the other end of all this is the neighbor that never has a garage sale.

And his shit is usually golden mainly because it has been collecting.

This is the type of garage sale you find like an unknown Rembrandt at.

The kind you hear about at the Antique Road Show.

I hate to admit that I watch that show, but I do.

Some of that crap is hysterical in that it is so ugly.

And yet, some dealier from God knows where is willing to pay thru the nose for a hand mirror that once belonged to Bobby Kennedy’s mistress.

Not a fan of antiques or the Kennedys.

One is worthless and the other will sell easily at auction, care to guess which is which?

Back to the garage sale.

When a bad garage saler begins to panic, its an ugly thing to see.

From the second the first customer comes on to your lawn and begins to paw thru your stuff, there is a countdown timer.

And when your timer hits zero, and its different for everyone, but when your timer hits zero, you panic.

And thats when the price reductions begin.

When you spent several hours the day before, carefully judging and considering what the prices of everything should be, all of that falls away and you start to desperately drop the price on things.

Because in the end, it just shit, and you don’t want to get stuck with it.

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Posted by on November 6, 2012 in Uncategorized


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