The Politics of the Homeless.

19 Mar

This is not about the politics that make the homeless possible.

Every government since the dawn of time has had homeless, so lets just say its a human condition and let it go.

This is about the political views of the homeless, which are as interesting and in some cases, as crazy as they are.

No apologies here, just read.

The homeless know a lot more about the world than we do.

In fact, there is a homeless guy sitting in the patio of the Coffee Bean, explaining how the world works.

He is sitting alone, by the way.

Can’t imagine why, seems like a knowledgeable guy.

And yet, he seems to have made a few questionable calls in his own life that advising others seems a bit of a stretch and all.

Because, and I could be wrong on this one, but meth seems to be his best subject.

Then again, I am just going by that lingering urine smell and the dental hygiene.

“Obama was raised by the Aztecs, thats why he does poorly in the deep South.”

So its a good thing that I have a poor sense of smell, because with a tag line like that, I am intrigued to stay and listen.

“Aztec? I thought he was born in Hawaii?” I shouldn’t get involved, but if you don’t stir the pot, it will burn.

“Thats what a lot of people think, and they’re all wrong. The birthers are right, thats a fake birth cirtificate. Except that he wasn’t born in Kenya, he was born in the catacombs in Guanajuato, Mexico.”


Now THAT is a whole lot of crazy.

I ask the obvious question.

“But how do you know?”

He looks at me like I am crazy.

I love this part. This is the stepping across the line into crazy part of the conversation.

He lowers his head and looks at me out of the top of his eyes.

“As I said, he does poorly in the deep South.”

Ah, I should have seen that.

And all this time, I thought he didn’t do well in the deep South due to lingering racism.

“I told you, you need to leave or I’ll call the police.”

The Coffee Bean manager has decided to ruin my morning.

I move along before the trouble starts.

It never pays to aggrevate the homeless unless its your job.

Once they get pissed, they are likely to strike out at friend and foe.

However, as I walk down the street, I can hear the homeless guy and the manager yelling, then just the homeless guy.

The manager, I am sure, has fled the patio and gone to call the police.

Starbucks is much quieter and has no patio.

Patios tend to attract the crazy hang out crowd.

As we’ve seen.

I stop at the newspaper stand outside to read the headlines.

I can still hear the homeless guy, raving at the top of his lungs up the block.

Just over the top of the newspaper rack, I can see a cop car, parked right out in front of Starbucks.

As I turn to go in, the door opens and two officers walk out, huge shining examples of the law enforcement community.

They are moving in a quick step up towards the Coffee Bean, one officer talking into the microphone clipped to his shoulder.

I wonder if they know about Obama and the Aztecs?



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Posted by on March 19, 2012 in Uncategorized


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