So close, and yet so far.

16 Dec

It is cold as hell and I am wearing shorts.

Shows how smart I am.

Although, this is Southern California cold, so it is mid 50’s.

Shorts with a hoody.

See? Winter wear.

As I have mentioned before, I park a quarter to a third of a mile from my office, with Starbucks in between.

To park closer would cost a crapload monthly.

My company likes me, but they don’t love me.

Besides, I can use the daily walk.

My main hobby is writing at Starbucks.

I am running late today.

I will only have time for a quick cup of coffee and a cursory glance at my email.

It is only when I am just hitting the corner, no more than ten feet from the door that I see them.

Evil couple.

My ass goes into clench mode at the thought of writing about them today.

I have written several thousand words about this beast of a woman and her husband.

At different times I have felt bad for him, for her, and for various others that she or he has crapped on.

I am still in love with my original description of her.

She thinks everyone is a moron and she is sick of their shit.

As I open the door, they brush past me.

Mrs. Evil, smiles at me as she goes by.

Mr. Evil throws me a quick, “Hey thanks” for holding the door.

I stand with the door handle clutched in my fist, watching them walk, arm in arm, up the street.


Do you know how many days I have waited for those two?

Some of the most vile, hysterical blogs I have ever done have been about them.

And I missed it.


I need to get back on it.

Back when I first started blog, specifically about these two, I would show up early and lay in wait for these two.

This is what we call a “Come to Jesus” moment.

Time to rededicate.

All of this goes threw my head in the few seconds between watching them walk off and scooting inside because I am cold.

Maybe there is some other distractions inside.

The only hope for fun is the Werewolf is in line, 2 people ahead of me.

For those who don’t know, the Werewolf is my nickname for a slightly balding business guy who is convinced he is sweetly dangerous with the ladies.

Unfortunately, the Vampire is nowhere to be seen.

That is my nickname for the secretary that shot the Werewolf down so hard last time, I thought she might have castrated him.

God knows he has it coming.

He has this whole creepy come on that does not work and he has no clue.

But, being shot down never seems to phase him.

And you have to admire his tenacity.

But he’s no Evil Couple.

Accept no substitutes.

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Posted by on December 16, 2011 in Uncategorized


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