RSS

Armageddon, brought to you by Pastor Harold Camping.

17 Oct

So, the world is ending and stuff…

Pastor Harold Camping, a serious hell-fire and brimstone snake oil salesman from Oakland California is at it again.

You all remember Pastor Harold, he was the one that said that the world was going to end last May.

Except that it didn’t.

However, right before his May 21st Armageddon deadline, thousands of the soft headed sent him millions. (If the world is ending, why should they keep it? A better question is, why would he need it?)

When that Saturday came and went, Slick Harry laid low for a few days, then said that he got his dates wrong, it was going to be October 21st.

Ok……

At a press conference back in May, Slick Harry then said that he believes Judgement day came and went and we just didn’t realize it.

The Almighty is giving us 5 months to repent since the world is going to end and all.

Kind of like an Armageddon lay-away program.

Anyway, that 5 months is up this Friday.

Time to pay the fiddler.

Let me throw out my own little prediction.

The world………..is not going to end.

And the Slick Harry, sorry Pastor Slick Harry will have an explanation why it didn’t, and it will somehow involve an extended deadline and the need for donations.

So it breaks down to the basic two items.

Nothing happening and donations.

Money makes the world go around.

Oral Roberts said, and I quote, “Donate 8 million or God will call me home”?

My brain was split in two different directions.

Part of me was stunned that the Almighty would be involved in some sort of shake down for cash.

The other part was in awe of Robert’s balls.

THAT is how you play the game.

Now, while this was in 1987, he still raised 9.1 million. In 1987, this was an astronomical

At the time, I remember wondering if perhaps the Almighty would call him home anyway.

Not until 2009.

Pastor Slick Harry is not as polished as Roberts. While his ministry raked in 80 million during a 4 year period, (According to the IRS) I don’t think he has the pull to make money demands.

He’s just not that photogenic.

Roberts pioneered Televangelism. He perfected the TV demand/pitch for decades before he tried for the big score.

Pastor Slick Harry is a fuggly old guy. (Combination of two words. Think about it.)

He kind of has that freeze-dried look I love in a tyrant.

If they arrested him tomorrow for child molestation, I would not be shocked. (Something about his eyes.)

Now if the Almighty would just call him home.

But maybe the Almighty is not looking to have to put up with him. Thats like getting stuck with the here-after check, and its never pleasant.

Or he gets shot during a carjacking, serial killer, something.

As long as its plausable, I don’t think it will be investigated all that hard.

Countdown to Friday.

Advertisements
 
Leave a comment

Posted by on October 17, 2011 in Uncategorized

 

Tags: , , , ,

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s